Final Countdown

22nd February 2012

22/2/12

Feb 22nd

The day I leave.

I’ve spent what feels like so long looking forward to this date, dreaming about this date, planning for this date, PAYING for this date that.. I don’t know what to do with myself or how to feel now it’s actually almost upon me.

I’m at work or I’m sitting at home or I’m at a family gathering where the usual questions pop up about my travels and I’m thinking.. “I leave next week.” “This time next week I will no longer be in the same country as I am now.” And I don’t know what to do.

For almost the past 6 months, which in the reality of things, isn’t a great length of time, every single little thing I’ve done in those months has lead up to and prepared me for this date and it’s weird. I’m not sure how to describe this feeling. I’ve spent so much time, effort and not to mention money in this plan, a plan that could be over before I fully take it all in. I don’t want it to pass so quickly before my eyes that I’m left standing back at Heathrow Airport wondering what the hell just happened.

On the flip side though.. I want to be standing at Heathrow Airport wondering what the hell just happened. I want to be in complete and utter awe of all the things I’ve seen, done and experienced that I come back with whiplash, from immersing myself so completely that I have to painfully snap back to reality. I want to feel the extreme comparable differences between the place I am now and the places I go.. And the person I am now, to the person I come back as.

So while I’m in this body of conflicting emotions, all I can do is count down to my departure date. But believe me when I say I am happy about my decision to do this, I wouldn’t have put so much of myself into this if I wasn’t! I feel so unbelievably lucky to have such an opportunity to remove myself from the daily grind and land smack bang in the middle of somewhere completely different. To be able to do the things I’ve chosen to do, purely for my own gain and my own selfishness.

So tell me, how did you feel counting down to that all important date – anxious, scared, impatient, ecstatic, all of the above? Let me know in your comments!

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: